We’re looked at with more shame. Some women are even born without hymens. Seriously, who would want to do that to someone they cared about? for sure, we’ve a long, sordid history of plenty of men (but not all, even way back when), valuing themselves by “taking” a woman’s virginity or “breaking” a woman, but that was never about love or respect for women: it was about men seeing women as objects and sexual property. Is painful or uncomfortable, and for others, it is not.
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Is called postcoital bleeding. That doesn’t mean you have to have been together for a long time or even be dating the person, but a sense of trust and comfort with this person will be very helpful.